Wednesday 31 October 2012

Heather! re: bellies

OH I feel you on the belly.  I HATE mine.  I have had two children and am also in my 40's, so I get it!  (I know your in your 20's, but THREE children will be sure to leave some marks:) NO way in hell does that exclude you from camming.  I have stretch marks, although not that noticeable, but I do have a spare tire or two.  First off, I try to minimise showing my belly as much as I can.  With the "rolls" I make sure I am always facing the camera (NEVER SIDEWAYS ACK!).  Also, a tried and true trick that you will see a lot of models use, (in fact, just did this myself last night).  If you wear a tank top, then get to your goal and they want naked, or tits etc, I just take the straps off, expose the boobs and keep the t-shirt around the middle. Makes it much easier.  Go have a look at some camming sites and watch for a bit.  DON'T watch the absolute top models, because they are "perfect".  Watch some middle of the road ones, and you will see, there is a market for ALL OF US.   We do not have to be perfect. 

The fact that we are "average" and not perfect makes us more REAL I think.  So the men feel more like "wow, this could be my neighbour, how hot is this?".  SURE, the top models are perfect in every way and have the porn star act DOWN pat, but that doesn't mean we cant make some money either.  So please, do not let the belly discourage you. You can work around it, and you will also be surprised at how men really don't care!  If your entertaining, they will come.  Of course, pussy and tits is all they really care to see anyway... lol. My thing is, be yourself.  Enjoy it, go with it and as long as you're having fun with it, that's all that matters really.  Again, if you want it as a HUGE source of income, you may disappointed.  If you go into it without high expectations I think you will be pleasantly surprised.

Yesterday was my first night back.  I was scared shitless.  I have not been able to squirt and that was my HUGE "draw" I figured.  So, I had a little bit much to drink before even getting on.  Then of course, I got all horned up before I even reached my goal and just had to have orgasm after orgasm after orgasm.  I made 700 tokens, so about $35 and it was approx. an hour and a half I believe.  I had fun.  Little sore today from all that pounding but dam I needed that.  I hope my squirt comes back!  Although, I must say, nobody seemed to mind that I couldn't.  My poor neighbours that live below me must really wonder what the heck I am doing up there by myself moaning, screaming and saying FUCK ME..  Thank God I don't see them much, I think I would be many shades of red.

I am going back on tonight for a couple hours since I have until midnight to make some $$ and get paid tomorrow.  I have dug out my old Lelo Vibrator to use.  Its perfect.  3 inches max of insert able length,  and maybe an inch around?  I cannot believe how FREAKING tight I am since surgery.  Very exciting.  Just praying my squirt comes back. 

Heather, let me know what you decided and ANY questions I am happy to try and help.  Not that I am an expert by any means. lol.

Thursday 18 October 2012

WHOOOHOOOOO!

Went for my six week check up and got the all clear to start exercising and "light" sex.  I am so excited to try out my new parts.  I had plans on giving it a go last night, but ended up being exhausted.  I am putting it off till Friday night.  If all goes well, I will return to camming on Monday night:) 

Very nervous about going back on cam after such a long absence!  I think I will need some Captain Morgans for courage....  Will update after my trial run.

Sunday 7 October 2012

ATTN: XXX

Hi XXX
I just read your comment.  First off for all the annoying PM windows.  In your profile settings when you log on you can set it to NO PMS with a message, or you can set it to friends only can PM you.  I have mine set to Friends only, but even then I find it gets annoying.  Its hard to entertain your room AND keep up with PM's.  I usually tell people that want to PM that I just don't do private messages as it takes my attention away from the room.  MOST messages are just guys wanting you to watch THEIR cams of them jerking off.  As far as the meanies, block their asses RIGHT AWAY, and try and let it roll off your back. 

Try and remember that those type of people are just asses.  They are not the majority, and they probably just get off on going to models rooms and being rude.  I always wondered about that.  Why would ANYONE want to go into a strangers room and say hurtful things directly to them when all they have to do is click next model? I think its a game to some. 

As far as earning $$.  Gotta remember, there are not very many that make the top model's and have the $$ rolling in.  The ones that DO, are generally very young, very hard bodied and treat it as the "porn" that it is, and not the place to go socialise (like me:).  They also have a gimmick (which we all do), but certain things work for some, and not for others.  Those top girls treat it like the "job" it is, and work hard.  They get the fan base from being on at regular times and promoting themselves etc etc.

Its certainly not a "job" for your average mature woman where they are going to make the huge $$.  The way I look at it, EVEN if I have a terrible night and am lucky to make $10 in two hours, I think to myself, well, its $10 extra dollars I wouldn't have made just watching TV, and I most likely had a good time chatting anyway.  Don't get discouraged, try to have fun and remember that as you develop a fan base (even if its only a few!) you will feel so much better about yourself.:)  As long as you are enjoying it, keep doing it.  When you stop enjoying it, take a break.  Apparently most woman burn out after 3 months and quit.  I like it to much to quit for good.  Keep me posted okay? 

NOTES ON MY RECOVERY:

So, since the surgery, I have been mostly on the upward slide of recovery.  I got a little carried away and had a bit two much to drink a couple times and got on my pole and did some hula hooping.  My libido is HUGE, and I still cant do anything about it!  Well, I can do outside stimulation, but have discovered that I CANNOT orgasm on JUST clit stimulation, I NEED penetration.  FUCK.  I have a lovely stitch hanging out my vagina as well.  I went to the ER when I found it to have it cut shorter.  I told the Dr. there that even the slightest tug was very painful, so please just cut it shorter.  The freaking Dr. PULLED on the stitch!  The whole hospital heard me scream and he just sat there "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry".

Once I recovered enough to open my legs again he got it cut a bit, but I just didn't want him even touching me so I left.  I cried the whole 20 min drive home and I DO NOT CRY.  This was the first time I cried through the whole procedure it hurt that bad. 

My follow up appointment with my surgeon is Oct 17th.  That's when I find out if I have healed sufficiently enough to have penetration.  I do not think I will be cleared until that dam stitch dissolves and who knows when that will be!  I am actually terrified for the first time.  I am afraid it will hurt, afraid I wont be able to orgasm etc etc.  I honestly think its going to take longer then six weeks for me to be recovered enough to go back to camming.  Where my cervix used to be (now called a vaginal cuff) I feel pressure and bit of tenderness still.  I am approaching the 4 week mark on Tuesday and I am definitely not near ready for insertion.